Lonlieness of a Long Distance Runner

I've been moaning and groaning for weeks now about how not looking forward I am to going back into high mileage weeks to train for my fall/winter events. I've come to love the 20-minute WOD. When we do endurance WODs that take 45-50 minutes it feels like it's soooooooooo long. Granted, there is a difference of going all out for 50 minutes compared to a steady comfortable run but the thought of doing anything over an hour these days is just not where my head is at.

That's going to have to change. Soon. I have a 20K, a half marathon, and the GOOFY CHALLENGE all coming up (with a Tough Mudder thrown in there for good measure). Endurance is going to have to be my thing again. I am stronger, faster, and more fit than I ever have been in my life but I know I don't have the endurance I did last fall.

I was talking with 2 women from Xfit, both Ironman finishers and they said the same thing. They're in better shape now than after doing the Ironman. If that's not a huge endorsement for Xfit I don't know what is. They also agreed with me: going out and doing long training runs is so unappealing right now when we know we can get phenomenal results doing Xfit.

I'm getting ready to put together my training calendar and I was thinking about those 16-, 18-, and 20-mile runs. Ugh. Hours and hours alone on the road. When I trained for NYC I reveled in that solitude. It was a badge of honor that I did all my training alone and pounded out every mile with nothing but my own thoughts. Some days were fine, I would lose myself in the rhythym of running and the miles ticked by fairly effortlessly. Some days I felt like every step was a battle of wills. I learned to take the good runs with the bad. Even though I blogged and connected to people in that way it was still very much a lonely process.

Yesterday was the Branford Road Race. I did it last year for the first time and loved it. The course is beautiful, it's challenging but not overly hard. I did 52 minutes last year (5 miles) and I was planning on trying to get closer to 45 this year. One thing about Xfit and running, we don't go out there and do miles and miles at at time but we do fast ones. Then we go do about a hundred other things and go back out and run more. Running is part of our WODs, not our whole focus, so anything up to 5 miles doesn't really rattle me anymore.

I have a dear friend who was doing this race for the first time and I knew she was nervous. She's amazing. If I could lift half the weight she does I'd be thrilled. She went from not having run at all to doing 4 miles last week as a training run. But this wasn't her comfort zone which I totally understand because last year it wasn't mine either. I thought about what Xfit means to me, how I could never have come this far without the support and encouragement of my Xfit family. I knew I'd have way more fun doing this race with her than busting my ass alone for *maybe* a PR (maybe not). So we did it together. She was awesome, she's got the biggest heart and she never gives up. I don't know if she had as much fun as I did -- I ran through every sprinkler and waved to anyone who waved at me, something I forget to do when I'm in that "to run is to suffer" mode -- but I hope she looks back and sees it for the huge accomplishment it was. At the end I watched her pull out a huge sprint to the finish and saw the pride and joy her family had when she crossed the finish line.

One of our friends from Xfit ran the race too. She decided the night before around 10 pm that because our friend was doing it, she would too. She did it on a whim (did fantastic, btw) because Xfit makes us capable and, more importantly, makes us family.

It made me reconsider what the next 6 months of my life will be. It doesn't have to be suffering alone, being stoic about the mental and physical drain of training for a long-distance event. I realized yesterday that I know at least 4 people from Xfit, probably more, that I could text the day before a long run and ask them to meet me somewhere on my route and run a few miles with me. That idea was so foreign to me but it's beautiful. It's the cultivation of months of bonding with people over blood (sometimes literally), sweat, and tears. In the beginning I wrote a lot about how difficult it was to think of myself as part of this group of amazing athletes. Now I can't imagine doing things without them. I've always known that I wouldn't hesistate to support one of my Xfit family if they wanted some company on a training run. Now I know I can ask the same of them.

Xfit is not only redefining my body in ways I couldn't imagine, it's redefining my whole concept of what it means to be an athlete. When I signed up I was certainly hoping for the former, the latter has been an unexpected and wonderful surprise.